One Author’s Secret To Finding The Best Cafes? Looking For Two-Star Reviews. – CoffeeTalk

Author Alex Falcone, a comedian, enjoys a two-star experience when traveling. She finds the best coffee shops to be Coava in Portland, Ore., Brioso in Columbus, Ohio, or Sey Coffee in Brooklyn. She uses a hack that works extremely well: she reads mostly bad reviews, specifically two-star ratings. One- and five-star reviews are useless; those are just crackpots and bots. Three stars are for cowards, and four stars are for liberal arts majors who had a three-star experience but grew up with grade inflation.

A two-star review is a thing of beauty. Somebody who goes through the trouble of logging into an app and typing full sentences on a keyboard to give a place exactly two stars has a story to tell. They likely are seething about something but feels honor-bound to give credit where credit is due. This is the stuff.

Falcone also shares other travel hacks and hot takes, such as taking the subway to see a city like a local, ordering TV reruns as the best in-flight entertainment, planning road trips around playgrounds, and focusing on black and blue fashion. She also recommends building your hotel shampoo collection for a lifetime of free hair care, ordering the Hindu meal on a flight, and getting a haircut on your next trip for true cultural immersion.

Two-star coffee shops have the same theme running through their reviews: “the barista was so rude, but the coffee was good.” The drink was so excellent that the reviewer couldn’t give it one star even if they might have been fuming over the uncomfortable stools or lack of WiFi and power outlets. They were coping with the impact of some slight, perceived or real, and fired up the app, ready to unleash their righteous anger on the internet. But then they took a sip and their vitriol was temporarily interrupted by the terrible admission “Oh, man, that’s pretty good though.” They wanted to write a full pan, but they must compromise. They explain that while this is certainly no way to run a business, scoffing at customers who ask for sugar-free boysenberry syrup, the second star is because the coffee did taste good.

Alex also discusses the importance of having a good cup of coffee to cut through hurt feelings and the value of employees who don’t put on an act about loving their jobs. They prefer employees who don’t put on an act about loving their jobs and love the swagger of a business that makes a product so good they don’t have to pretend to like selling it to you. If the Soup Nazi made bad soup, he would just be a Nazi.

Falcone appreciates the two-star experience and the swagger of a business that makes a product so good they don’t have to pretend to like selling it to customers. They encourage others to read reviews and consider the value of good coffee and service workers in their travel experiences.

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